Thursday, January 15, 2009

Mommy the Pirate

So, this has been one really long week already at the Koski house. Back in November, I had a hemorrhage in my right eye. Long story short (or as short as this explanation can be and still make sense), I have scar tissue in both eyes. At some point in my childhood, I developed something called histoplasmosis. Apparently, it is a big thing here in our neck of the woods and lots of people get it and have no clue that they have it until it starts causing problems later in life. I am the perfect example of that!

I have known for years that I had histoplasmosis because the eye doctor could see the scars (called histo spots) in my eyes at my annual exam. I saw a retinal specialist when we first found the spots and he confirmed that they were not active, so we just needed to keep an eye on it (no pun intended!). Well, back in November, one of the scars decided to grow and it found a blood vessel close enough to it; thus, the hemorrhage in the eye. Because it is so close to my retina, I was able to notice changes in my vision that were a cause for concern. I went in and was sent immediately to a retinal specialist for evaluation of the hemorrhage. 

He explained to John and me that they treat these things by injecting the eye with a cancer drug that has been found to help dry up the blood, but has not been FDA approved for that use. However, their case studies have shown that it is effective. So, I had injection #1 back in November. We have to wait one month between injections. I was due to go back the week of Christmas, but his office had to cancel our appointment. My file fell through the cracks a little and they put me off until February. 

Called on Monday because my vision was really getting bad in that eye. They had me come in that day and he confirmed that the hemorrhage is, indeed, growing instead of shrinking. Very well could be because they did not get me in there at the end of December. So, after another injection on Monday, I had a reaction and my eye basically spit the medicine back out - not sure how much stayed in there and the eye swelled up (sorry, I know it is so yucky!). Went back today for a follow-up appointment for the reaction and it has gone away almost completely. The pain is much more bearable today, so for that I am really thankful.

My vision is no better than it was on Monday, but he still thinks that the hemorrhage is shrinking. We go back on February 17 for another injection. In the meantime, he gave me the go-ahead to patch my eye so that I can focus on reading, writing, driving, etc. without getting a massive headache from trying to focus with an eye that basically only works in one half of the eye. So, we are now patched. And Ella is getting a huge kick out of it. Apparently, I am now the only pirate at our house.  :-)

The one really bad thing about my eye having a reaction is that I had to cancel a trip to Cincinnati for Sophie and Ella to visit with my mom and stepdad. There was just no way the doctor was going to let me fly in that much pain and not knowing for sure that the medicine was going to reverse the reaction. Luckily, he told me today that I will be cleared to fly by this time next week, so for that I am thankful. The girls and I will head to Cincinnati in March during Sophie's spring break, so we have something to look forward to. Thank you to all of you who prayed for Sophie as I broke the news to her. I could feel your prayers and she is already doing much better about the whole thing.

Please pray for my eye. Pray for the medicine to work. Pray for peace in my heart as I remind myself that our God is WAY BIGGER than this vision loss. He took it away and He can give it back. Or He can choose to keep it the way that it is. No matter what, He is in control. I am resting in that. I am scared and I am frustrated and I am sad, but I am okay. He is STILL holding me in the palm of His hand. Thank you to all of you sweet friends who prayed for me this week as I was in and out of the specialist's office. Your calls, notes, e-mails, and text messages were so uplifting to me. I wish there was more I could say because thank you sounds so insignificant. Just know that you all have been such a testimony to Christ's love in action, and my family loves you all very much!



Now that I can actually focus again, I will work like a madwoman to get more pictures up! Thanksgiving, more Christmas, and Ella's "Pancake and Pajama" party coming right up.......

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